Fiction Short: Pigville's Annual Food Competition

Hey guys!

 

I reached 4000 twitter followers late last week and to CELEBRATE decided to give away a short story!

 

 

The winner was chosen randomly and was cast as the main character of the short story. The winner was allowed to choose *three things* to include in the story.

 

Twitter user: @craigdougscott won!

*Please note that his avi is a piglet before continuing. Also you should follow him, he's hilarious.*

This is our main character Craig Doug:

 

Craig chose three things to include in his story: Enchiladas, swords, and koalas.

 

So without further ado, I present the very silly short story . . .

 

 

 

Pigville's Annual Food Competition

By L. B. Scott

Once upon a time there lived a piglet named Craig Doug who loved to cook. Craig Doug loved to make every type of food, but his friends considered his cheesy enchiladas to be the best of the best, and would travel for hours to be there for dinner if they heard he was making them. But while Craig Doug loved his enchiladas, he was best able to support himself by selling pies from a stand in his front yard.

One day, as Craig Doug was busy making pumpkin pies, he saw his friend George Piggles running up the driveway, grunting and squealing with a piece of paper in hand.

“Craig Doug!” George yelped, tripping over his hooves and slamming face first into Craig Doug’s front door. George stood and shook his head, before kicking open the front door. “Craig Doug! The Pigville Food Competition is coming up! You must enter your cheesy enchiladas! The Grand Prize is 500 gold coins and a brand new copper stand mixer! You won’t have to mix your pie crusts by hand ever again!”

Craig Doug listened with a hoof on his chin. “It would save me a lot of time, and I could produce twice as many pies with a stand mixer,” said he. He also considered that those gold coins could pay off his mortgage. 

“See! It’s settled! You must start cooking immediately! The competition is tomorrow at noon!” George was breathing heavily and took a seat at the kitchen table, using a napkin to wipe his forehead.

“Would you like a slice of chocolate pie?” Craig Doug asked, holding out a chocolate cream pie that he’d made that morning.

“Would I?!” George exclaimed. George jumped up and took the pie from Craig Doug’s hooves, and shoved the whole thing in his mouth in one go. He licked his fingers and smacked his lips before yelling, “DELICIOUS! Well I better be off! I’ll see you at tomorrow’s competition!”

Craig Doug waived and sighed as George left. He’d only offered a slice to George and that pie was specifically made for a piglet’s birthday party down the street. Now he’d have to start over. Craig Doug began cutting butter for fresh pie dough, he would need to finish this pie before he could even think about creating his signature enchilada red sauce for tomorrow's competition.

 

Far past midnight, the enchiladas sat cooling in the kitchen window, and Craig Doug was fast asleep on his couch in the Livingroom with the TV blaring the Online Jewelry Channel.

*SMASH*

Craig Doug woke with a jolt! He raced into the kitchen where he found the kitchen window shattered and his competition enchiladas were GONE! Craig Doug grabbed his tan coat, a magnifying glass, and leapt out the front door, where he saw the terrifying outline of a BEAST! The beast turned and growled with razor sharp teeth and bright flaming eyes! It hissed, before scampering into the woods with the enchiladas in its clutches!

Craig Doug shuddered, for he knew what the beast was. Drop Bears were well-known to be carnivorous and dangerous, and he knew he’d have to travel to the woods to get his enchiladas back. No one in Pigville EVER went into the dark woods alone, not with Drop Bears afoot.

Craig Doug knew he would never win the competition with canned enchilada sauce and there was no way there was enough time to make more before the competition at noon the next day. Mustering some bravery, Craig Doug grabbed a flashlight and took off into the woods after the stolen enchiladas.

Following the shadow deeper and deeper into the woods, Craig Doug heard growls and hisses from the trees above him and chills ran down his spine. But he needed those enchiladas back, so he kept on. Nothing could deter him now, not the scary skeleton trees, nor the howling winds.

Soon the dirt path of the forest turned into river rocks and Craig Doug realized he’d stumbled upon a lake. He thought he saw something glint in the water, but Craig Doug assumed it was some kind of silver fish. As he walked around the lake, its reflection sparkled off the full moon. This was no silver fish!

Craig Doug waded into the water, reach in and pulled out . . . A SWORD!

Craig Doug gasped at the magnificent sword in his hoof as a streak of green light flickered on the point. Its handle was bejeweled with clusters of emeralds which were foggy and covered in algae. Craig Doug wondered how long this sword had been in the water?!

Braver now, Craig Doug continued after the Drop Bear using his nose to follow the scent of enchiladas deep into the dark woods.

After walking for what felt like miles, Craig Doug came upon a clearing where he heard a slurping sound, and saw a dark figure bent over in the shadows. Fearing for his enchiladas, Craig Doug poofed up his chest, stood as tall as his could on his tip-hooves, and yelped and squealed at the Drop Bear, waving the sword around as best he could! The Drop Bear turned, straightened as tall as a tree, at least three times as tall as poor Craig Doug, and let out a horrifying ROAR!

Craig Doug fell back onto his bottom, and lifted the sword again in defense! He covered his eyes and shook on the ground, but the Drop Bear didn’t make another sound. As Craig Doug looked up, the moonlight was reflecting off the lake sword, and its green light pierced the heart of the Drop Bear. The Drop Bear’s eyes contracted and changed to black, it shrunk three sizes, and its sharp teeth rounded over, until the Drop Bear was nothing more than a regular sweet koala.

Craig Doug stood and the koala was his same size. The koala blinked three times. 

“Thank you savior!” the Koala said, bowing low to Craig Doug. “I ate a golden mushroom and was changed into a Drop Bear!”

Craig Doug stared in awe. “You’re welcome, koala. What is your name?”

“I am Toby. I have been cursed to be a Drop Bear for weeks now! I don’t even like enchiladas! I love pie, but in Drop Bear form enchiladas was all I could keep down. It was either that or eating the pigs of Pigville! You saved me from a horrible fate!”

“Well I am Craig Doug, and I have many pies at home if you’d like to come! I followed you because I need these enchiladas for our annual food competition tomorrow.”

“Yes please!” Toby handed Craig Doug the enchiladas, and the two walked back to Pigville just as a purple dawn was breaking over the mountains.

Toby ate three whole eucalyptus pies while Craig Doug set up his station at the food competition.

The judges tasted Craig Doug’s famous enchiladas, Mrs. Bacon’s blueberry crumble, Mrs. Hogwart’s smoked salmon, and Mr. Boar’s 3 bean chili.

The judges huddled to make their decision as all the contestants gathered on the stage. Mrs. Hogwart’s smoked salmon came in 4^th place and Mr. Boars 3 bean chili was 3^rd. Mrs. Bacon side-eyed Craig Doug who yelped as she was nearly 10 times his size. He nervously faced the judges.

“And runner up to the First Annual Pigville Food Competition is . . .” one judge said, as Craig Doug pulled on his tie to give himself some air, “Mrs. Bacon’s blueberry crumble! The winner of the Grand Prize 500 gold coins and a copper stand mixer is, CRAIG DOUG’S CHEESY ENCHILADAS!”

The crowd went wild and Craig Doug was given his prizes and a big ribbon to display above his award winning enchiladas.
 

Craig Doug paid off his home with the 500 gold coins and even had enough to spare to buy Toby a eucalyptus tree, which he planted in his backyard. Toby moved in and the two made pies and enchiladas for all of Pigville, including a special Chocolate Cream Pie for George.

The End